Monday, August 10, 2009

Green Eyed Monster

I abhor the feeling/emotion/state of jealousy. I hate when I see it in other people, but I especially hate it when I experience it myself. Of course, I get jealous, I would be made of stone if I didn't feel the twinge of jealousy every one in a while. For instance, I am extremely jealous of people who do not have mold in their house, or who do not have to spend money on a massive remodel as the result of mold/water damage. I am/have been jealous of people who seemed more pulled together or just seem to have "things easier" than me.

I equally hate seeing others experience jealousy because it can bring out such an ugly side of people. A side that I know they would not be showing if it were not for some frustration, unhappiness, or stress in their life. I feel that when things are not going well in a person's life, they tend to focus their stress/frustration on coveting others' situations, possessions, etc. Seeing the ugly side of jealousy in others makes me very aware of jealously in myself. It reminds me that jealousy really is an ugly monster, and while I am only human, I should do everything I can to combat it.

I know it is not possible to eliminate all feelings of jealousy, so I have decided to channel any such feelings into something positive. If I am jealous of someone for having something that I want, I am going to just work harder to obtain it. I'm going to use the evil feelings of jealousy as motivation, to push myself towards the kind of life that I want. I am going to remind myself that everyone I meet is fighting a greater battle than I, and what I see on the surface is not always the reality. When I see a friend exhibit jealous feelings by way of gossiping or judging, I am going to gently steer them away from that and point out the positive in the situation. At some point, we all want what we cannot have; but that desire, that want, can be channeled into positive energy.

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