Tuesday, November 1, 2011

The Speed of Mom

The other day I settled a case in 30 minutes. 30 minutes and it was done, settlement agreement written and signed. Opposing counsel was also a mother of a toddler. Coincidence? I think not.

Toddler moms move fast. We move fast while maintain accuracy because we have to. Because toddlers are crazy and all over the place and toddler moms are experts at containing the crazy.

We move with lightening speed to pry out whatever sharp/dirty/dangerous thing the toddler may be trying to chew on.

We move swiftly with cat-like reflexes to scoop up a tumbled over toddler, trying so hard to run/climb/jump, and cover him with kisses.

We eat in a flash because while the toddler may be happily munching his raviolis one minute, we know that in a second he could be flipping his toddler shit and flinging raviolis at the dog.

We pee like we are in a crowded bar and there is a line of drunk angry girls out the door because, let's face it, it is awkward to pee with a little person staring at you and trying to unroll the toilet paper so you just want to get it over with.

We zip through Target either on our lunch break or with a toddler in tow, hoping to pacify him with a cake pop from Starbucks so we can buy diapers and a cute pair of shoes (and we only go to the Targets with Starbucks for obvious reasons).

But every so often, we slow down, take advantage of the illusive toddler snuggle, read a story, and drink in the wonder of being a toddler mom.


  1. Moms get everything done faster. It's just a fact of life. =)

  2. Truth.
    The ratio of Speed of Mom : Speed of Dad is infinitely larger. More truth.