It is not secret that I think a lot about being a working mom. I mean, I kind of talk about it constantly. To the point where my sister says that I need to just realize my kid is awesome and get over myself. While she has a point, there are a few things that have been floating around in my head for a while about being a working mom.
First, I'm pretty damn proud about being a working mom. Of course I have my moments of self doubt and I will get upset if people say rude things to me about it or if I read stupid things about it (for example the comments on babble.com are a sure fire way to get me spitting mad), but for the most part I am proud of what I do and confident in my decision to work. The one thing that really makes me question everything is when I see working moms with grown children who are complete fuck-ups. Like can't hold a job, dropped out of school, drug problems, relationship problems, etc. I'm a very "the proof is in the pudding" kind of person. I know that me being a working mom is right for my family because we are all happy, healthy, and thriving. But when I see grown children of working moms all screwed up, I always wonder if they got screwed up because their mom worked too much. I realize this wondering is stupid because there are plenty of grown children of stay at home moms who are also big fuck ups. But still it always makes me wonder what went wrong.
Second, at Leo's daycare they have little figurines of people dressed for different professions. There is a doctor, firefighter, chef, and such. One of the figurines is a woman dressed in a black suit with a cell phone and briefcase. The other day when I dropped Leo off, he was playing with the figurines and his teacher held up the woman in the suit and said, "here's a lawyer, just like mommy." I have to admit, my heart swelled with pride. My son was playing with his teacher and hearing about how his mother is a lawyer. My son will grow up knowing that women can be anything that they want, including a lawyer. This made me very happy.
Third, one day this past week I was walking up to the daycare to pick up Leo. I ran into my very good friend from law school who was also picking up her son. She asked me about the trial I was in and I asked her about her arbitration. For a split second I thought, look at us in our cute suits, talking like fancy lawyers, on our way to pick up our adorable sons, we kick ass. I have to say the working mom gig can bring about many moments of questioning the choices we have made so I will definitely take the moments were I feel like I'm kicking ass and cherish them.
Now you know the working mom thoughts that have been floating around in my head this past week. There has been a little bit of questioning accompanied by feeling very happy about what I do.